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heaven on earth March 18, 2007

Posted by guinever in christianity, healing, heaven, life, loss.
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My comfort, my quiet place, my cemetery is a day away. 800 miles away. But I want to walk among the stones. To read names and dates. It’s been three months since Abby’s death. A quarter of a year. A trimester. A season. Spring has faded into the hot days of summer where there is no rain.

This is an excerpt from my journal, dated June 22. Today’s sermon at church was about heaven, the topic in Sunday school was heaven, so I was reminded of what I wrote nearly 2 years ago. The rest of the journal entry follows:

I asked Todd if he would please take me to a cemetery. He said, “A cemetery? You mean any cemetery? ”

“Yes,”I replied. He had seen one on his bicycle ride, so there was one close by. I was grateful that we didn’t need to go into the city.

When we got there, a butterfly stabbed through my sadness and made me smile. I let my eyes follow its flight til two others joined. They spiraled together heavenly out of sight in the evergreens. A butterfly dance.

After walking through the cemetery, I came back to that original place–a small clearing among the trees–hoping to spy a butterfly again. Yes, the butterfly, yellow and black, was visible again. It retraced its path again and again. It circled, going up and down. It’s flight was marvelous and as I stood there watching it, peace and happiness enveloped me.

I moved to the center of the butterfly’s path and spun with it, making myself dizzy. And I worshiped.

Worship. A little closer to God. A piece of heaven on earth. Is it possible that heaven isn’t somewhere else, way up high? Could it be that heaven is here, but just in a different dimension where our human eyes can’t see or our human ears just can’t hear yet? Angels all around us? Our loved one’s spirits all around us? Maybe. Maybe not.

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